Questions,Mysteries,Musings: Fear

I asked in an earlier blog if it was necessary to know everything. Is knowing everything and “figuring out” everything a necessary part of evolution?

A few weeks ago I was intent on having another OBE and it dawned on me that I was intent on this because I believed on some level that this was a necessary part of evolution. “How can I experience ‘miracles’ if I had not yet mastered ‘magic’? ” As I laid supine, eyes closed, my mind wandering as thoughts and images raced and floated past my mind’s eye, I tensed, experienced fatigued, mental exhaustion that often required me to sleep after each unsuccessful attempt at OBEs. In the days and weeks since this belief arose to my conscious self, work resumed, life continued on. And a new thought arose. “How can I experience anything at all if I have not yet mastered fear?”

“If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to the mountain ‘move here, to there’ and it will move…”-Matthew 17:20

I’ve been afraid of having an OBE despite my many attempts to do so. I’ve been afraid of what I’d see and as a result my body tenses up making me unable to truly leave my body for long. I’ve had one moment of remote viewing since my last OBE attempt but I did not leave my body, only viewed (through my mind’s eye) other, beautiful dimensions. And I know now that we exist in many dimensions. I realize that there are many other worlds and that I exist, simultaneously, there too.

But what does that mean? It means that in another dimension, in an alternate universe, I chose to be a counselor. It means that I’m a mother, a wife, a spiritual nomad/priestess/prophetess/shaman, in some other dimension and these are all playing out simultaneously while I am here playing the role of RN. It means, that if I choose (and with the right conditions), I can manifest all these things in this dimension because they already exist in another dimension. I’m learning on many spheres, not just one. And I’m connected to all of this (because there is no separation, only the illusion of separation).

But there was the fear.  I was sitting in my NICU class thinking about this (on my down time of course) and I realized how little of said fear was truly necessary. I’ve been encouraging my cousin to embrace all of herself (her gifts included) and here I am resisting what seems to happen naturally for me when my mind clears and I allow whatever happens, to happen.


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